Forced Opportunities for Thanks

Thankful that your kid is sick?

So...it's weird to be thankful when your kid is sick, right?  But, that's where I find myself whenever my kids get taken down by some kind of bug, especially one that can cause a lot of worry - not just the sniffles.

Our oldest had a headache yesterday morning and when I took his temp it was 103.4.  I did the usual thing of Tylenol, hydration, resting.  He was feeling better a couple of hours later (and fever was down) and we ran a couple of small errands.  When it was time for Baby Girl's nap, he sat down with a book and I went to the desk to deal with some paperwork.  I went to check on the boys a little while later, and he was asleep with his face smooshed up against his knee.  It looked pretty comical, so I went to get my camera.  When I came back, he was sitting up, eyes open, and clearly dazed and confused (not referring to the movie of the same phrase!).

I started asking him questions, to which he wasn't responding.  He felt so incredibly hot.  I got the thermometer and asked him to open his mouth...he was clearly trying, but couldn't do it.  His lips started trembling.  I put it in as best I could and it jumped to 104.1 - without it even being under his tongue!  He started twitching a little and I start thinking of a fever-induced seizure or something...I ran to get a washcloth on his head, called my hubby to come home NOW, then dialed the advice nurse.  He clearly wasn't right...and it was scary.  The fever is one thing.  Not answering my questions?  Twitching?  Yikes.

Long story short, he started to get cooled down and was snapping out of it.  I knew he was going to be okay when after I had sat with him looking into his face for a long time without any acknowledgment from him, he all of a sudden looked at me strange and said, "What?"  Like, what are you looking at?  He was better by the evening...  Today he started vomiting, but that's not the point of my story...

This isn't the first time I've had this revelation, but after a little time goes by, the message wears off and I forget again...but here it is: The time, devotion, and undivided attention that I gave to him when I was super worried about him and doing whatever I could to make sure he was okay?  Why don't I behave that way all day EVERYDAY?  Why don't I spend that time with him, looking him in the face, asking him questions, even when he doesn't have a fever?  I confess...it used to be that way when he was the only child.  Then the second one came along and it got a little harder...and now with three, I'm exhausted.  And this summer vacation with 3 kids at home all day everyday in this cramped apartment?  I'm having trouble making emotional connections with my kids.  I face it everyday and try to force myself to sit on the floor and give them my undivided attention.  I've been terrible at it this summer.

So, in that regard, yes, I am thankful my kid got sick.  I was forced to sit down, look at him, love on him, nurture him, pray for him...all the things I've been struggling to do this summer.  I thank God I was forced to given the opportunity to stop and make him a priority - and have an immense sense of THANKS that he is mine, and that he's okay.